White Noise MP3s.com

It was one of those mornings where the mist and wisps of the fog had twisted and risen in the valleys, lingering like the last river spirits of the night, reluctant to admit that dawn has already broken.

‘Twas in this befoggled morning dawn during a rainstorm that I recorded this, right on the bank of the Deerfield River with my trusty pair of DPA 4060-BM omnidirectional condensor microphones mounted onto my GUY HRTF baffle. My Sound Devices 722 and Lunatec V2 mic preamp were both safe and sound in my watertight Pelican 1500 case but while they were sitting there being fat my 4060s had to take all the beating.

Constant plummeting rain falls throughout the river, forming a high exuberant counterpoint to the lower bass and sub-bass of delicate rolling thunder rumbling across the tops of clouds above the listener. The thunder has a low soothing growl rather than startling claps or crashes or booms, so any progress you make towards sleep or being one with the universe will not abruptly discombobulate. Subtle, sparsely scattered bird calls can be heard in the distance.

The sexy streaming flow of water from the river has a more engaging, relaxing, random variation of natural white noise when compared to electronically processed white noise or white noise software. The duality of both low and high frequencies facilitates listening as our ears tend to crave for one or the other after prolonged singular exposure to either for an extended period of time.

A tirelessly shifting array of liquid awesome — this is the only MP3 that takes you right to the balls of the storm without getting your ass fried by lightning. This is a 360-degree quasi-binaural field recording so when you listen with headphones, you’ll be able to fully immerse yourself in the rainstorm in complete 3-D surround sound. Here’s a link to my binaural recording techniques.

No music, no voices, no planes, no synthesizers, no bilk. No layering or looping effects were used in any way to enhance the storm.

The full 63:57 MP3 has no fade-in or fade-out at the beginning or end, so it can seamlessly be played looped without any distraction or sudden change of tempo.

Duration: 63 minutes 57 seconds.
Size: 87.8 MB.
Bitrate encoded at 192 kbps for finest audio reproduction.

Nothin’ but Rain features the sound of nothin’ but (and that’s a really big but) rain - pure, peaceful, refreshing rain.

Rain for rest and recovery, relaxation, concentrating while working, and washing away all stress and tensions.

Rain that makes you wanna wrap up all nice ‘n cozy in your favorite soft blankie to lull you off into dreamland.

Rain so good it makes you wanna slap yo’ momma.

And I don’t mean the stupid looped rain found on the generic spa sounds CD that farts in your ears every 20 seconds.

When I say nothin’ but rain, what I verily profess is a rich cleansing stereo binaural field recording of all the natural ebbs and flows, intensities, gradations and rhythms, and all the subtly variating nuances and acoustic intricacies of a luscious hour-long countryside rain spell on a lazy autumn September evening — with no thunder, no birds, no insects, no animals, no man-made noises, no music and no looped farts that would act to occupy or engage your attention.

This is a 360-degree binaural field recording. When you listen with headphones, you’ll be able to fully immerse yourself in the rainshower in complete 3-D surround sound. Link to binaural recording techniques.

Give it a listen and if it doesn’t help you sleep or concentrate any better than before, e-mail me and I’ll gladly refund or replace your purchase.

Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella? fo’ drizzle

Duration: 65 minutes 47 seconds.
Size: 90.3 MB.
Bitrate encoded at 192 kbps for finest audio reproduction.

Recorded on a quiet misty summer night, light rain dribbles upon a small moonlit bank while a deep mesmerizing concert of gentle chirping night crickets peep and whistle along with a backdrop harmony of other night time insects. You can hear the occasional fall of dewdrops from the leaves.

I have supplemented this with a steady stream of soothing white noise. Designed to provide the nostalgic auditory summer stimulus that winter and urban living lacks, this’ll help you find your organic sense of grounding that you usually seem to lose during the winter months.

The elements of rhythm are complimented by a natural randomness factor that is relaxing, soothing, and pleasantly refreshing. These combinations of sound best stimulate one’s auditory sense, while the absence of bass frequencies leaves the attention unperturbed. These unique characteristics make this MP3 an aid for meditation, relief for depression and stress, and a natural drug-free gadget for insomniacs.

This passes beyond the realms of awesome into dimensions of quantum hyperliquidawesome not yet charted by humankind that if you were able to grasp the mere concept of it its awesomeness would simultaneously explode both your bladder and brain.

NyQuil in the form of audio.

Listen to this while driving and you’ll die.

Duration: 63 minutes 45 seconds.
Size: 87.5 MB.
Bitrate encoded at 192 kbps for finest audio reproduction.

Duration: 65 minutes 31 seconds.
Size: 89.9 MB.
Bitrate encoded at 192 kbps for finest audio reproduction.

A most fortuitous acoustic happenstance as it may be, this fabulous chance recording was chronicled right on the spur of pure tragedy — I honestly had not foreseen recording this ginormously huge sumbitch on the steps of my friend’s porch during the series of severe storms on the dreaded afternoon of August 19th, 2005.

Honestly. I mean, we were discussing politics and homemade chicken pot pie in the dining room while having homemade chicken pot pie. We certainly weren’t discussing torrential rainstorms the size of Angelina Jolie’s upper lip.

That’s why you carry your portable field recording gear with you wherever you go no matter what, homeslice.

Having been armed with a matched stereo pair of DPA 4060-BMs clipped onto my hoodie (touching each ear for quasi-binaural imaging), a PA-24NJ battery mic preamp, and a Sony PCM-M1 DAT, I captured the complete sonic birth, materialization, and early incursion of a supercell storm.

The Toronto Supercell storm struck at 12:30pm as part of the Southern Ontario Tornado Outbreak of 2005, which later spawned two F2 strength tornadoes, produced winds of well over 100km/h, golf ball sized hail, extensively flooded more than half of the Greater Toronto Area, and completely laid to waste Finch Avenue near Sentinel Road in North York with damages in excess of $10 million CAD. Swords will fucking cut you wide open.

Everyone was inside their homes being fat except for me. The winds were galvanizing — had I used my tripod or HRTF baffle to record this, my gear would’ve easily been swept away as supercell fodder in one succinct blast of wind - thus I had to sit and meditate on my butt for an hour.

I belched once, but I’ve edited that out. Thanks, homemade chicken pot pie.

Duration: 65 minutes 7 seconds.
Size: 89.4 MB.
Bitrate encoded at 192 kbps for finest audio reproduction.

Chilling in a cave with a waterfall that’s right outside as innocent little water droplets in your vicinity drip, dribble and splash, listening to this makes you feel immersed, protected… and thirsty.

Mmm… water.

Duration: 62 minutes 13 seconds.
Size: 85.4 MB.
Bitrate encoded at 192 kbps for finest audio reproduction.